"Our House"

Season 3 Episode 21
Canadian airdate: March 29th, 2004

Boycott the Caf name: none
Important characters: Sean, Ellie, Candy Bandits, JT, Manny, Tracker
Issue of the Week: Milking the nanny state

Jay and Sean are at the mall. I don't know why they wanted to hang out there since neither of them has any money. They decide to steal a DVD (I think it was a DVD about how make homemade candy), but the two are not the least bit crafty at shoplifting, so they are caught and close lined by mall security. Bam! Hey Jay, if you want to be a badass, maybe you shouldn't make it so obvious that you intend to steal something. The only way you could have made it more apparent you were shoplifting was if you yelled out, "Hey, let's steal this DVD WITHOUT PAYING FOR IT! That's right, hide it in our jackets. My black jacket!"  I don't know why you guys were so sloppy there when you've already gotten away with stealing so many candy bars and DVD players before. You just grew overconfident.

Tracker, Sean's older bother who Sean lives with, is hopping mad that Sean can't stay out of trouble with the cops. Tracker tells him the Candy Bandits are a band influence and he should stop hanging out with them. Sean then rightly points out that if he weren't friends with Jay, he'd have to go back to being friends with JT and Toby and that is way worse.

Eww. Liberty and Towerz. Disgusting. I didn't even know Towerz was still around.

Sean loves making out in class. In the background is Amy, the last girl he made out with in school. She is so jealous.

JT wants to ask Manny to Marco's Stupid Gay Indian Dance. Spinner thinks that would be a good idea if he wants to get laid, because Manny is a giant whore.

How about how I'm not sure which one of them is Spinner there. Way to copy Spinner's hairstyle, JT. Why does every other guy on this show have to copy Spinner's look? Because Spinner is kickass, that's why.

Big news, it turns out Tracker got a job on an oil rig in Alberta, so the two of them have to move RIGHT NOW. Sean is upset over having to leave Degrassi, which I think is in Toronto, and which I think is a long way from Alberta. Or maybe Toronto is in Alberta, I don't know. The point is Sean has to move.

Don't move so fast! Sean no longer has to move. The next day he was able to get on student welfare, which means the government pays him to stay in Toronto and go to school. He evens gets to keep the apartment for himself. That's sweet. I wish there was student welfare in America.

This means that Sean and Tracker are parting ways. That's too bad, they had a good run. But this marks a new era for Sean. He's his own man now.

He's his own man who eats chocolate milk and cake for breakfast. Rock on.

Sean's apartment is rocking now because he's throwing parties every night. One night Ellie tries to help him study during a party, but they are interupted when Jay brings in the Montreal Crew, the toughest cats this side of the 45th parallel.

The Montreal Crew are a wild bunch of Francophones, look at them starting a fight. The MC is a rowdy bunch and it looks like they might be beating up Marco.

The fight is interrupted when Alex finds Amy lying down in the bathroom, dead from alcohol poisoning. Light weight. Guess you couldn't hold your Molson. The Montreal Crew then takes turns having sex with her body while it's still warm.

The next day, Sean has to get his welfare papers signed by Crippled Shop Teacher, who is sponsoring his welfare fun. Sean admits to him that a girl died at a party at his place. Crippled Shop Teacher refuses to sign until Sean can convince him that the partying should stop. Sean then says it will, and Crippled Shop Teacher signs the papers. Oh, I guess that's all the convincing it took.

Oh, hey, I forgot to fill you in on the rest of JT's B plot where he wants to ask Manny to the dance. Liberty tries to help JT by asking Manny, "So Manny, the semi-formal draws nigh, got a sari picked out?" What the fuck does that supposed to mean, Liberty? You said a bunch of things that weren't even words there. You are fucking useless. Die bitch.

JT takes things into his owns hands, and was about to ask Manny out when he saw her talking to Craig. Since every time Manny and Craig are alone they have sex, JT logically assumed they were going to fornicate. But they weren't (Manny must have been in the red) so Manny was mad JT assumed so, until JT apologized, at which point Manny agreed to go to the dance with him.

Way to go JT, you nabbed Manny. That's downright cool of you.

That's how it rolls in our house.

Rating: A
Sean is awesome. More Sean the better, I say. Spinner may be slipping, and Sean is the cool kid on the block now.

Intensity Level: 100% INTENSE
Sean strikes out on his own, Amy dies, and JT actually gets a girlfriend.

More Awesome Spinner Quotes:
"Hey, that's not Raditch! But a good choice if you're looking to 'get some'!" (said to JT about Manny)